Halloween: The scariest thing that I could find

To celebrate Halloween I wanted to share the scariest thing that I’ve found in a long time.

This is from a tabletop miniatures game called Infinity

Agema's NCO & Spotbot

Apparently this lady is called Atalanta, she is an elite sharpshooter of ALEPH’s Steel Phalanx (whatever that is!). She is accompanied  by a scary bunny who is apparently Spotbot that provides her with shooting bonuses.

Halloween Nails – I wish that every day was Halloween

It would be lovely if every day was Halloween and I could wear flamboyant nails without scaring too many Clients, however in the real world I have a short time-window where I can get away with it – so every nail counts!

Even with the Halloween grace period there is a balance to be sought between cute and scary. For examples these are too scary to get away with at work and would be really hard to coordinate with any outfit.

halloween nails scary

(Photo from some TArt)

These are possibly too cutesy, I can’t exactly work out why there is a blue zombie rabbit!

halloween nails pumpkin

(Photo from a BlogSpot site)

The white is too stark for my tastes (and skin tone) – although the little spider is cute:

Halloween Nails spider nails

(Photo from PolishedLoveAffair)

I really love the purple, pink and black contrast,  but there is a little too much white on the witch nails – maybe it is meant to be the moon? I also think that one witch would have been sufficient.

halloween nails

(Photo from a Buzznet site that seem to have taken it from somewhere else judging by the watermark – which I can’t clearly read)

I often have mixed feelings about textured nails but these provide an interesting contrast to the cute black and white skulls. They are also work-friendly if no one looks too closely!

Halloween Nails - black and orange

(Photo from becomegorgeous – although looking at the watermark I again suspect this has come from elsewhere!)

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

TV and random things ‘Sleepy Hollow’ related – who buys this stuff?

I am currently taping the new TV version of ‘Sleepy Hollow’, there doesn’t seem too much point in starting watching until I have a few episodes saved up – a tactic that worked very well for the last two seasons of ‘Supernatural’.

Searching the internet to see how many episodes are in the first season I noticed there seemed to a lot of results for “Sleepy Hollow” on Ebay.

Some of these are pretty mainsteam, for example the World of Warcraft action figure for their headless horseman – complete with little demonically alive pumpkin monster.

world of warcraft headless horseman action figure

Others are a little more specialist – creepy weathervanes are nice but you really need the right house to pull it off.

headless horseman weathervane

 

Finding the right house might be easier than finding the right dog to wear a little saddle and headless jockey. The pumpkin head just looks too tempting…

headless horseman dog costume

All photos from random Ebay auctions.

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Book: ‘Blood Noir’ – “only show your cookies to the people you love”

I will admit to being a little prudish about graphic sex in films or books; I blame a combination of bad writing/scripting combined with stereotypical British discomfort and unease about the matter.

Whilst I can hide behind my hands from the TV it is harder to do that from a book, hence why urban fantasy is a good genre for me as the sex tends to be less graphic and the plots more action based. Even most paranormal romance has surprisingly few sexual pitfalls.

obsidian butterfly anita blakejpg

Whatever the genre it is a nice feeling when you find a series that you like and the first few books have been ‘safe’, however some series then throw a curveball and in this instance I specifically mean Laurell K Hamilton’s Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series.

Anita starts the series as a zombie raiser (animator) and vampire executioner, the novels have a strong detective streak and some horror. In the early books Anita sporadically works with the police, largely in crime scene reconstructions and occasional monster hunts. She is appropriately armed and as physically dangerous as a petite woman can believably be when faced with monsters (and monstrous humans) who are larger than her.

Very quickly vampires and vampire politics start intruding into Anita’s world (‘Guilty Pleasures’, ‘The Laughing Corpse’ and ‘Circus of the Damned’), followed by were-creatures of all varieties (‘The Lunatic Café’, ‘The Killing Dance’, ‘Burnt Offerings’).  Even at this point the books were still fun, if anything the mixture of beasties (human and supernatural) were adding to the interest.

The ninth book, ‘Obsidian Butterfly’ was where things got weird – although this was weird in a good way! Anita ends up in New Mexico helping out Edward, aka Death, investigate some strange killings only to encounter a terrifyingly strong vampire.

blood noir anita blake

This was the last book in the series that I planned to own, as in the following book (‘Narcissus in Chains’) Anita catches the ardeur which makes requires her to have sex multiple times a day – which seems a bit of an odd plot device! I have read the rest of the series to date – excluding the most recent book, but have no interest in rereading them! However I found ‘Blood Noir’ (book 16) cheaply in a charity shop and didn’t remember that over the top sex was now almost the sole feature of the books.

By chapter 2 the book decided to go off into BDSM sex, chapter 2 starts on part 13 which I would have expected to be a little quick for most people! That is barely time to even start foreplay!

The actual plot is covered in well under 50 pages of a 350 page book, the rest of it is largely random sex and tantrums, which isn’t terribly engaging.

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Cleaning cat teeth – using blood as toothpaste

Pets are a lot like small children when it comes to little tasks that you *should* do that are really easy to run out of time to prioritise – like checking for nits/fleas, meticulously check all their toys for damage on a regular basis and so on.

Then periodically you will hear or read something that makes you feel guilty for not prioritising this task more, complete with worrying statistics!

cat teeth

(Photo from CatSit)

For the cats my main problem task is cleaning their teeth. Giving them treats that claim to be good for teeth is easy and sometimes they even eat them when I am watching to give some measure of comfort that F isn’t scoffing the lot.

I am aware of the principle of how getting a cat used to teeth cleaning SHOULD work

  •  First get the cat used to the idea of having their mouth poked – stroke the face near the mouth or even massage the gums with fingers/cotton bud. Get the cat used to this stage!
  • After a few sessions, put a little bit of cat toothpaste on your finger and encourage the cat to taste it. Get the cat used to this stage!
  • The introduce a toothbrush designed for a cat – this can be a traditional style brush or a finger toothbrush. Get the cat used to this stage!
  • Eventually you will be able to apply the toothpaste to the toothbrush and into the cat’s mouth!

cat bite

(Photo from some WordPress site)

Like all things in principle it sounds oh-so easy! The reality was more like this:

  •  Discover that cats hate being poked near the mouth – get bitten
  • Buy overpriced toothpaste in fish flavour, cats sniff it and look grumpy – cats do not bite as that would mean getting near the toothpaste
  • Put finger toothbrush on finger, discover that cat teeth go through the toothbrush and straight into the finger, this hurts, the toothbrush has holes in and slight blood stains.
  • Decide that feeding the cats dental treats is probably nearly as good as tooth brushing!

I have booked a vet appointment soon, I will see what they have to say – although given they have seen the bite-radius caused by an angry G I do think they may agree that dental treats are the future.

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Is Voodoo Chicken food poverty?

It is fashionable in some quarters to say that food poverty in the developed world is due to people not knowing how to cook – for example Jamie Oliver’s statement that “most low-income families do not know how to feed themselves properly and instead choose expensive options such as ready meals.” (Quoted from the Independent’s article)

It is an interesting point if you leaving aside any inference of whether he was being paternalism or patronising, the potential of counterproductive results from treating people as a homogenous bunch of stupidheads and the sad fact that fresh food (specifically fruit and vegetables) are REALLY expensive!

zombies hate fast food

The definition of eating “properly” is also not one single answer – as a general rule less fat, salt and sugar is a good idea, but less than what? Guidelines from governments, charities and quangos add to the confusion with statistics, figures  and recommendations; which certain food manufacturers then exploit via meaningless traffic lights which can make the product  look ok until you realise that one portion is defined as a quarter of a pre-moulded square.

Very often people say that this is a modern problem, that the older generations can cook properly – I am not convinced. For example my mother-in-law’s cooking is odd; she makes and decorates very pretty cakes – prize winning ones in fact!

Yet somehow her day-to-day cooking can be a bit underwhelming. It tends to be frozen bits of meat and two vegetables covered in lots of sauce which features lots of salt. We don’t visit terribly often but when we do I always dread mealtime, but apart from the salt levels the food is probably relatively healthy.

soup kitchen

(Photo from Blotspot)

Being a full-time unpaid babysitter of her daughter’s child has taken its toll on her, one visit we had two meals that consisted of cold sliced meat and bread –which reminded me of Save The Children’s 2012 report “It Shouldn’t Happen Here” which mention how “one in eight of the poorest children in the UK go without at least one hot meal a day”, so perhaps my mother-in-law is trying to spread awareness of how undesirable this is.

However the line “at least one hot meal” is relatively meaningless if it doesn’t also include that the hot meal must have some nutritional value, for example M-I-L does a dish which I call Voodoo Chicken. It is very cheap cuts of chicken, mostly skin, bone and gristle, boiled for hours until the smalls scraps of meat dissolve entirely. So she serves up a plateful of parts that can be used to construct a Voodoo effigy and not much else!

It isn’t even just main meals that she can make unpalatable; she makes the most disgusting stodgy summer pudding that I have ever tasted – whilst as the same time declaring that she can’t stand sponge in trifles.

She will talk about death or dying people over the dinner table, complete with gross details, or even worse we get to hear about her daughter’s child’s toilet habits in more detail than I would want to know about my own offspring!

rubber chicken

(Photo from some shop)

Least this seems like a bitter rant from an ungrateful daughter-in-law I must add that my own mother’s cooking is probably worse – she has repeated served up sponge cakes that could have been used as a house brick. My mother also makes her own fish pate created using a method that must be blend a fish (complete with bones and skin) into a pulp and serve on toast, so anyone who eats it ends up with a mouth full of tiny sharp bones – just the memory of this is making me retch!

It was so bad at one point that I could only eat fish after first pulling it into tiny pieces and inspecting each scrap for bones – I am now making a concerted effort to be less scared of eating fish.

My mother’s dinner conversations tend to consist of things that the dogs have done or eaten – which isn’t as dissimilar to my M-I-L’s conversations as you might think!

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – this is only in relation to TEXT unless noted otherwise! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Nails: Fairy tales – Number 1 In Deutschland

I’ve been using the word “Über” too much lately.

Über reminds me of the band Hanzel und Gretyl but I am not sure I’d want to see any nail art inspired by them, so a couple of letter swaps later I end up with Hansel and Gretel and end up looking at fairy tale nail art.

There are a wide range of potential fairy tales to turn into nail art, but it makes sense to do something instantly recognisable so you don’t spend the entire day explaining what is on your nails! For example Rapunzel – complete with Pascal her pet chameleon.

rapunzel tangled nails

(Photo by Luchessa)

Little Red Riding Hood is also a nice choice, familiar enough to be recognisable but with enough freedom to have some flair – I love the fact that this mani is so dark and creepy!

little red riding hood

(Photo from KasNails)

Even a simple frog prince can led to fab nails

frog prince nail art

(Photo from abackwardsstory)

The trouble is sometimes it is easy to get ambitious, which can mean your artistic rendition of an Evil Queen makes her look pre-melted.

snow white queen

(Photo from naildesignblog)

Then there is just the stuff that is scary, I honestly have no words for describe this mani, other than it reminds me of ‘My Little Pony Equestria Girls’ – which is never a good thing!

what the hell nail art

(Photo from some TArt)

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Film: ‘Disturbing Behavior’ – “Who put the acid in my Spam?”

‘Disturbing Behavior’ is a one of those films that isn’t horror and isn’t science-fiction but incorporates elements of both. This in itself means the target audience is a bit fractured, the fact that it is a teen film makes the potential audience even smaller.

James Marsden – who went on to play Cyclops in the first 3 X-Men films, plays Steve Clark a high school senior who moves to the town of Cradle Bay with his family – parents and one sister, following the suicide of his older brother.

Disturbing Behavior

(Photo from awesomebmovies)

The school has a jock crowd called the ‘Blue Ribbons’ who are the pride and joy of the school psychologist. They seem to generally be dreadful people and to only care about those in their clique. One of Steve’s new friends, Gavin – who went on to play John Conner in ‘Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines’, is convinced that the Blue Ribbons are recruiting via sinister means as people join them having made unbelievable transformations seemingly overnight.

Steve isn’t convinced… until Gavin joins the Blue Ribbon!

Katie Holmes plays the female lead, Rachel Wagner, which it a bit of a token gesture as she basically spends the movie pouting! However whilst pouting she does play a minor part in helping Steve find a video which Gavin left before he was transformed, then She pouts along as Steve works to uncover what is going on with the Blue Ribbon and the increasingly creepy school psychologist.

There may be spoilers below the picture.

cyclops

(Photo from marvel-movies.wikia)

The shrink is indeed evil, he has experimented with implants and mind control on various teens (including his own daughter) and the Blue Ribbons are the latest refinement of this plan. There is a glitch with the implant, when the teenager is sexual interested it causes them to become violent!

Steve grabs his sister, Katharine Isabelle from ‘Ginger Snaps’, and tries to escape the Bay, however his parents want him to be chipped too!

There is the predictable happy ending after the school janitor’s electronic rat-deterrent sends the Blue Ribbons crazy and drives them to jumping off a cliff. Steve kicks the shrink off a cliff leaving Steve and his sister – plus Rachel and some very pale bloke, to run away from home on the ferry.

Nine Inch Nails Trent Reznor

(Photo from Last.fm)

Gavin doesn’t jump off the cliff with the rest of his brain-washed buddies, instead he appears at the end of the film as a new teacher in a disruptive inner-city school. Except in the director’s preferred version where he instead gets shot on the ferry and dies complaining that he didn’t get to meet Trent Reznor.

In fairness at the time of the film’s creation Nine Inch Nails had only released ‘Pretty Hate Machine’ and ‘The Downward Spiral’, it is the subsequent albums that render Gavin’s dying wish so pitiful.

I had remembered ‘Disturbing Behavior’ as being a good film even if the plot was a bit basic, however it hasn’t aged well as it doesn’t contain enough to be scary or enough science-fiction to be interesting. Which is a shame, however it is still better than Keanu Reeves’ remake of ‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’.

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Book: Paul Johnston’s ‘Body Politic’ – in an independent Scotland ‘IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH’

With the mounting attention being paid to the vote on Scottish Independence it reminded me of two  books that were sitting at the bottom of the “possible charity shop” pile – Paul Johnston’s ‘Body Politic’ and ‘The Bone Yard’.

These are the first two books in a series of five – the remaining three being ‘water of death’, ‘the blood tree’ and ‘the house of dust’. I found the first two abandoned at a train station and felt sorry for them, so I rehomed them.

The vote on Scottish independence is due to take place on the 18th September 2014 and has been dumbed down to avoid confusion; the question is “should Scotland be an independent country” with Yes or No being the only options.

body politic paul johnston

I haven’t been able to work out how you can have a vote on this without there being an actual plan as to how it could be achieved in the event of a win by the “yes” vote.

Having a sensible and considered plan would be a bonus, but currently there isn’t even a half-assed plan, so I guess the vote happens and in the event of a “yes” win then they will make it up as they go along, trying not to ruin their fragile economy – and taking their fair share of the current UK national debt.

So the books are set in 2020 in Edinburgh, Scotland has broken away from the UK and the world economy has fallen into ruin following seemingly-endless wars and drug problems.

Edinburgh is tightly run by a council of Guardians with the support of auxiliaries – a glorified police force who are referred to by their uniform number rather than their names. The aim was for a society modelled on Plato’s ‘Republic’ (which the books keep mentioning!)  with no crime, a large number of forbidden activities and strict controls on the few things that aren’t illegal.

So naturally the rulers are somewhat corrupt and the underbelly is rank & diseased – much like a Soviet-era satellite state.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

(Photo from Wakeup-world)

The main character is a detective called Quintilian Dalrymple, in the first book he officially works for Park Services and moonlights as a detective; to be honest he isn’t terribly good and seems to get lucky rather than competent.

The first book won at least one award, the ‘John Creasey memorial dagger for the best first crime novel of the year’ and it isn’t a bad book really. The second one is less interesting and wanders into odd territory. Both are a little graphic in places in ways that don’t add to the plot.

The books also aren’t as intelligent as I think the author wants the reader to think, however for the sheer amusement value of painting a picture of an independent Scotland formed with utopian vision only to fall into the same sin and filth as the rest of the world – but with none of the freedoms, is amusing.

Ultimately Johnston’s first two books are a poor man’s ‘1984’ containing nothing that tops the Ministry of Truth for a truly damning vision of the future – ‘IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH’ indeed.

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Scary cat toys – just in time to get bad habits entrenched for Halloween

Cat toys are big business and sometimes they can go very wrong.

However with Halloween looming who is to say that wrong is bad?

That said I am not sure that giving your cat a toys in the form of severed fingers that smell of catnip is a good idea, it seems more likely to reinforce bad behaviour and I do prefer my fingers attached.

severed finges

(Photo and production from DesertRDesigns on Etsy)

In the same way I am not sure that detached eyeballs lovingly coated with catnip is prudent. The trailing gore is a nice touch though…

eyeball cat toy

(Photo and production from Kanga23 on Etsy)

I can’t find anything as creepy for dogs on Etsy but I did find something terrifying on Amazon.com in the form of ‘Kooky Spooky Skull Dog Toy’ – which not only looks Halloween-friendly but also cackles with sinister laughter when squeezed.

Kooky Spooky Skull Dog Toy

(Photo from Amazon.com, I am struggling to find a UK stocked, which is disappointing!).

Copyright © WhereEvilThoughts 2013 – excluding pictures! Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to WhereEvilThoughts with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.